February.

   Hello bloggers! It has been a while since I last posted an entry in my simple blog. If you read my previous entry, I stated that I was mourning for the sake of what I call a 'bitch'. I know it was useless for being sad over someone who doesn't actually loves you, but that's what I've learnt from my mistake. The fact that I was ignored by my crush has got the best of me and left me devastated. But thankfully, I've grown stronger than before and I will surely pursue my life even though nobody wants to love me except for God, my family and my friends. They are the reason why I survived from a period loneliness. I realized that nothing can stop me from continuing my life.

   January had left me devastated and helpless. I thought that I'll never get up after being knocked down by the challenges in life. But I was definitely wrong. I stood up to them and got stronger day by day. Everyday I hope and pray that my life would be better and thankfully it did. Now that I got through the down side of life, I wish after this I'll get the chance to be happy again. I've missed the happy days back then when you were by my side. But this time, I want to be happy only by myself. Without anyone but me. Maybe then, I'll finally understand the state of happiness of being single.

   I wish February would show me the light and get me back on track. There's no use of crying over spilled milk. What I can do now is to improvise and try my best to redeem myself. I'm looking forward to sing in the rain without any hesitation and worries. I will achieve that glorious day and just get done with it forever. What I need is a little motivation and support either from my family or friends or God. I am so ready to face my next challenges in life. One thing for sure, I will never fail myself to achieve what I've always wanted.

Mourning.

One day you were by my side. Smiling like an idiot. Dancing crazily with a cap on your head. Your height was my only cover from the sunlight. Getting bored of dancing alone, you took my hand and I danced along with you. There was no music though just you humming Olly Murs' song Heart Skips A Beat. Just for once, all of my sorrow was swept away. I was indeed very happy whenever you're with me. I never really thought about you leaving me. All I did think of was eternal happiness.

One day you just disappeared into the darkness and left me grieving. You left me nothing but memories. My heart shattered into millions of tiny and discrete pieces. I was devastated. Nothing could cure the pain you've caused. Everything seems to fall apart and crumble. Revolving doors stopped swinging. Birds stopped chirping. People stopped talking. Music stopped playing. Nothing is how it was back when we were still together. Echoes of your voice is fading away.

Today would be the 30th day of your ignorance towards me. Every morning I wake up, the first thing I do is to check my inbox for any of your messages. But nothing was there except for your old and dusty messages. You used to be my greatest thing, but now you're just a memory to let go of. I swear, the way we say our goodbye is not the way anyone in the world would ever do. Who knew that through ignorance, a strong relationship could fade away and break apart just like that. It's like with the flick of a thumb, our bridge is completely burnt without any chances of it to be stopped.

Like the waves in the ocean, I will always come back for you whenever you are in need of me. I know you probably won't ever come back but I just wish that you would. I've been secretly mourning for a very long time now. I just couldn't stop thinking about the reason you are doing this to me. What did I do wrong? Why did you have to leave me forsaken after all that we've been through together. I'm not being motherly or fatherly, but I just want to know WHY?

I hope you'd still remember about that gift I gave you  last time right after you went home. It is okay if you want to clear any memories about me inside your head. I don't think it's too much to ask for. Perhaps that is what you wanted all this while? You can take what's yours and I will take what's mine. But must we go there? It doesn't have to be this hard. All you need to do is to clear things with me. We don't have to take it this far. If you really value our relationship, pick up the phone and text me or just leave me a voice message. I just want things to be the way it suppose to be. Not the opposite. Love makes life look hard.

Jolly Merry Christmas.

|25.12.2011|

It's Christmas time. :) 

For that, let's listen to some Christmas songs from Glee. 

XOXO

JLS - Take A Chance On Me

" Baby take a chance on me. " - JLS, Take a chance on me.


Hello Beings. haha. :P 


This morning I woke up a little bit early. I had to accompany my grandfather to the hospital at 10 am. Pity him you know, his arthritis is just something that I can't bear to see. He's hurting and he can't walk without any support. At the hospital, I waited outside the door because my father told me not to enter. This time, I didn't feel disgusted with the hospital because it's a different hospital. The clean and awesome one. HAHA. :P 


In the evening, I slept for 3 hours. Well, I was planning to sleep just for a while and wake up at 4 pm to do my homework and stuffs. But when I open my eyes, it was nearly 6 pm. I was like, *OH SH*T. =,='' 


At night, I cooked eggplant with some olive oil and i made fish soup with tamarind. It was a very simple dish and I loved it. The soup is the main attraction. It has that sour taste. Ah. Delicious. 


Overall, today was boring because there was nothing extraordinary happened. I'm looking for something special to post in my precious blog. When I've found it, I'll post it immediately lah. :) 


XOXO
Roger&Out. 

Willow featuring Nicki Minaj - Fireball

"I'm the fireball in the party" - Willow Smith, Fireball. 


Howdy Mate! 


School is going to start in 2 weeks. I'm not ready to go back to school. -,-


Today as usual, I went to my granny's house and really tried to make myself enjoy this holiday. I had 2 eggs for breakfast. Sunny-side up. Then, I went to the hospital to accompany my granpa for his review. Seriously, I hate the smell of the hospital. It's the smell of death and sickness. *vomits. 
But I guess I have to learn to bear with the smell because I shall be a successful doctor in the future. Yes, my ambition is to be a Doctor. I'm not quite sure what kind of doctor, but doctor it is. 


After the review, we went back home and settled down. I slept for 3 hours. While I was sleeping, my granny fed my granpa and she helped him with things. As I woke up, I cooked my lunch and ate it in front of the tV because Cougar Town asked me to do so. :P 


In the evening, I went outside and took some photos with my sister as my model. These are the pictures I got : 

Awesome right? HAHA. 
Okay, I'll continue blogging tomorrow. My eyes are getting heavier. Huh. Goodnight. :) 


XOXO
Roger&Out.

One Direction - What Makes You Beautiful

"that's what makes you beautiful" - One Direction : What Makes You Beautiful. 






Hello Bloggers. :) 


on this very night, I want to make things DIFFERENT. instead of typing neatly, let's type chaotically. :D 


okay, here goes nothing. *fingers crossed. 
firstly, I bought the latest issue of Galaxie last morning and I was kind of excited because it's the 'Music Issue'. the front page pictures were Kelly Clarkson, Justin Bieber, Nicole Scherzinger, Charice and Joe Jonas. well, from the look of the front page, I have to admit that it is indeed exciting enough to attract buyers' attentions. I mean, all of them are AWESOME and HOT and SUPERB. on the first page, the excitement was still there. as I go on to the next page, next page, next page. the excitement DROPPED. T,T i dont know why but the pages got boring and boring and so on. until that one point, I feel like, 'this is the worse issue ever'. aside from the songwords section and the posters given, the rest was just a piece of expired apple pies.*have to be cautious about my language.* anyways, today was BORING. there was nothing to be done and there's nothing so special about today. just an ordinary day. oh, and thank God, I am still breathing fresh air and still eating edible foods. alhamdulillah. 


well, i guess that's all for now. bye. 
p/s : enjoy the video. One Direction. \m/

Fullstop.

Well, it seems that you've found someone new. I knew that you wouldn't wait for me or at least care about my feelings. You do only what's best for you without thinking what it may do to me. And last time, you've said that you'll wait for me, and you'd tell me if you changed your mind. But now, did you tell me that you refused to wait, and find someone else instead of me? Did you even tell me that you've changed your mind? Instead, you told me that you have another guy, and you're loving that guy. I'm not furious or mad, but, at least, please care about my feelings, and tell me earlier that you're loving another guy, so that I'll stop waiting for you and move on with my life.

Just to let you know, I want to be the one you open up to, the one you tell all your desires to, the one who knows what you want, the one you tell your deepest secrets and the one you fall in love with. But, I guess all of my wantings are just dreams and it will never come true. I know I've been a bad lover before, but time goes by and I changed too. I promise you that I'll be more loving, caring and fun to be with for the rest of your life. You have my words and I'll prove it to you. Unfortunately, I can't prove it to you anymore for now you have someone else and I don't want to mess things up and be the spoiler to your relationship.

And one more thing, actually, I really am happy for you. If you think that you've broke my heart, please don't think it that way cause my heart is just fine. In fact, it is much better now because you found someone new whom you can share your secrets with, open up to, tell all of your desires and someone who knows what you want.

I'll always be your friend, I'll always be there for you when you need someone to rely on and you can always borrow my shoulders whenever you feel like crying. Last but not least, I wish you all the best in your future undertakings, and may God bless you now and always.

I miss you .

I miss the way you talked,

I miss the way you mocked your face for me,

I miss the way you laughed,

I miss the way our eyes met,

I miss the way you walked,

I miss the way you made your hair,

I miss your body language,

I miss your sense of humor,

I miss your jokes,

I miss your voice,

I miss your smile,

I miss looking into your eyes,

I miss the way you look when you're bored,

I miss the way you eat,

I miss the way we spent our time together,

I miss the way you tell me about something,

I miss your accent,

I miss your smell,

I miss holding your hands although it only lasts for several minutes,

I miss your everything.

I dedicate this to the person that I admire the most. Although sometimes, we sit far from each other, seldom talk to each other, we will still be the perfect two. This person inspires me the most. This person made me laugh every time we meet. This person melts my heart with his sweetness. This person is always there for me. This person is the only person that could make my heart beats fast, and make me blush. This person is the peanut to my butter, straw to my berry, the star to my light. I will always remember you until the day I die. Love you! XOXO

PMR .

Gawd! PMR is almost here, and I'm not ready to face the exam yet! Well, I guess I have to stick up with my plan B, which is :

- Less online, maybe 1 time in a week, or none.

- Eat healthy foods which are good for my mind.

- Sleep early.

- Decrease my hand phone usage in these last hours.

- Sacrifice most of my times, to study including during my leisure.

- Lessen my singing times, or else, I'll lose most of my knowledge in my cute big brain.

- Pray, including Solat Hajat.

- Read more book instead of novels.

- Gain my confidence.

Okay, there you have it, summary of my so called plan B. I freaked out when I knew that PMR is in 40 days! I regret wasting my time. I wish I could turn back time, and realize that time is the most precious thing to me. But, I know, there's no use of regretting the past, just let the future be. In fact, everything happen for a reason. Perhaps, right now, I'll freak out, but when the day comes, I'll be extremely calm? -what a dream!-.

Well, PMR is in 40 days, and I'll promise to make the best out of it. I wonder, how will the students look like when the actual PMR day is here? Will they freak out? Or will they just relax and be extremely cool? Hmm, I don't know yet, but I hope I'll relax.

I think, that's all for today, I may update my blog on the weekends only, due to my plan B. haha.

Thanks for reading . ! Tatatititutu !

Plans for today .

Well, hello there once again readers to my adorable readers! Its Sunday, and its time for leisure! Yippee!

As I woke up today, after I ate my 'Sahur', I was extremely enthusiastic about doing some photography sessions today with some of my 'models' a.k.a. my sister, and cousins. They have always been my models since I started to be active in photography, especially my lovely sister. She's so inspirational to me. Every time I take a picture of her, her personality shines like a bright sunlight, and its impossible to endure the excitement and enthusiasm of taking some snaps of her.

Okay, enough with the stories of my sister! As I indicated, today I will be doing some photography sessions with my 'models'. I was wondering, where should I meet them? When should I meet them? Well, after a few minute of thinking, I finally found the answer! Luckily, today, my parents organized a family break fasting at my grandmother's house, and all of my cousins were invited to make it happier. For a minute, I felt a glimpse of excitement and enthusiasm. But then, something bothered me, and the 'thing' was, HOMEWORKS! In all of a sudden, I felt like, my day would be crushed into pieces, and my plans for my Sunday, would vanish in a blink of an eye. I kept a positive thought, and think about it. Maybe, this time, I'll divide my time for homeworks and leisure. Huh, truthfully, I suck in dividing my time to do some things in a day. Hmmm, it'll not be as bad as it could be. Perhaps, I can do my homeworks at night, and have fun in the morning, like my teacher said, "Don't get too stressed out because of homeworks or studies, have some fun."

Well, okay that's all for My Sunday. Wish me luck for today! =)

Thanks for reading !

My Exam Result Sucks .

I received 8 of my exam results this week, and it was a little bit, building, but at the same time, disappointing. Well, I'll tell you what my result looks like, :

Bahasa Melayu : 77 % ( B )

Science : 75 % ( B )

Geography : 65 % ( C )

Mathematics : 63 % ( C )

Pendidikan Agama Islam : 59 % ( C )

Sejarah : 58 % ( C )

Kemahiran Hidup : 53 % ( D )

Bahasa Arab : 51 % ( D )

Okay, there you have it. Now, as you can see, if you read my post about my First Term exam (Click Here), I made so much improvements and yet, some of my marks are so unacceptable. You may realize that there is something yet somehow missing in action. I didn't insert my English marks, because I haven't received it yet. But, I can tell you that, I got 37 /40 for my paper 1 , and for my paper 2, I don't know yet. For your information, I'm hoping that I could get an A in my English, because that's the only thing that I'm "Good" at.

And just now, my father asked me about my this, and I was extremely anxious about telling him what did I get. But eventually, I found the will to tell my father about my results, and it turns out that I was scolded harshly, and he told me to turn off the computer, and open some pages, instead of typing something that would make my life miserable. I am very disappointed in my Kemahiran Hidup's marks. Last time, I got 63 % , and now, it fell right into the hole of DOOM. As for my Bahasa Arab, I somehow expected that I was going to get that marks, because it is absolutely difficult to be answered! Plus, the Ministry Of Bahasa Arab Malaysia, had published a new format for the paper, and after 2 years of learning and training about the previous format, it somehow turned into ashes. (sobs..)

Well, I guess that's all, and to you readers, PLEASE pray for my success in PMR this coming October ! If you did, thanks , I really appreciate it.

Good Night ! ♥

Somebody To Love.

Lately, I've been craving to have a girl by my side. I don't know why, but I guess I really need to start to find someone new. Put yourself in my shoes, then you'll know what I'm feeling right now.

My latest breakup was very heartbreaking, for she was the most wonderful girl in the whole world. Nothing can change what she meant to me. She's the only one that I want, nobody else in this world. A long time ago, I always insult the people with girlfriends / boyfriends at my school. Maybe, that time, I wasn't matured enough to know the true meaning of love. But now, when I knew it, it's like my world is meaningless without my girlfriend by my side.

She's the apple of my eye, and when we met, my heart bumps furiously. She was my first love, and some people said that ' First ones are always the hardest. ' At first, I didn't believe that its hard to forget the first ones, but when I broke up with my ex recently, it was ultra-heartbreaking. I felt so lonely, with no one to hold on to. Every night, I think about her most of the time. Sometimes, I can't seem to sleep and when I looked back at her picture, then I could sleep.

For me, losing her is the last thing that I wish could happen. Although she told me to wait for another 3 months, Its like I can't wait much longer. I'm tired of waiting all my life to fall in love with a girl like her. I'll Love her no matter what'll happen in the future. May God will always bless the both of us.

I'm a really bad person !

Huh... Just, I had a fight with a girl named Ily Mumtaz Iskandar in Facebook. At first, she commented my status saying that I like gays stuffs. I was totally mad at that time, and say, " don't judge a book by its cover. " . And then, she deleted me from her Facebook! I was like, "Whoa." . I am a really bad person. I bet the girl is crying right now. Haha. Well, to that girl, there's something I want to tell you. " When you meet people, make sure you know them right. And never talk bad things about me, or you'll pay for it. "

Tata . ! =)

Photography ?

Firstly, let me give you the definition of the word ' Photography '. Photography means, 'The art or process of producing images of objects on photosensitive surfaces'. Lately, 1/4 of my friends were indulging themselves into photography. Sometimes, it makes me wonder, why in the world would they want to do photography? As a hobby? As a form of relaxation? I don't really know why, but there's one thing I know about Photography. Which is, taking pictures of a perfect scene and getting rid of boredom. And for your information, I tried this and all that I did was wasting my precious time, although some of the pictures that I took was fantastic, but still I can't seem to accept Photography in my daily life. And, actually I have a DSLR camera, which I don't seem to use often.

Well, I have a friend named Aniq, and he really loves photography. He made photography as his way of life, which is awesome.He was the first to introduce photography to some of my friends. And he often brings camera to school and taking pictures of the students, which sometimes annoy me. But, there's something weird about him, which is, he always screams loudly in class although there's a teacher in the class! And secondly, he take things slowly and easy which I admire.

Then, the second person to follow Aniq's style was my friend named Zarif. He's been quite a good friend with Aniq lately this year.I don't know why and how did they become close, cause I don't mind about them. I mind mine own business. Zarif shocked me, cause, in all of a sudden he brings a camera to school and sometimes do photography with Aniq.

Frankly, after a few months after Aniq introduced photography to everyone, the numbers of cameramen were getting bigger and never stop growing. I was extremely astonished with this thing around me. Maybe in a few years from now, the next generation of my school would be the weirdest among all. And this school would be called, ' The Camera School ' . Isn't it cool ? huh.

Well, okay that's all fro today and hope we'll meet again. Goodbye.

PMR .

Whoa, the PMR examination is around the corner! I really need to focus more to my studies, and leave all the unimportant things behind. Since my UPSR result was kinda great, my whole family expect me to get greater result in my PMR. Sometimes, it kinda pressure me and I can't deal with it until I have to knock my head to the wall, and get some snacks to eat. When I look back to my previous exam results, I have to focus and study more in Geography, Mathematics, Pendidikan Agama Islam, Sejarah, and Bahasa Arab. While the other 4 subjects, I need to do more practice, and improve my marks.

For this PMR, I would like to get 9A's if I could, and if I can't, I'll accept 7A's 2B's.

That's it for today. Bye. ^^

" Girl, leave me alone. "

Lucky Number 5.

Okay, I just got back from school and I got my exam result for the First Semester. My result, is just THE SAME.

Nothing's Lose, Nothing's Gained. Here's my Result. :

Bahasa Melayu : 71 (B)

English Language : 88 (A)

Sejarah : 48 (D)

Mathematics : 42 (D)

Science : 67 (C)

Geography : 63 (C)

Pendidikan Agama Islam : 57 (C)

Perdagangan dan Keusahawanan : 63 (C)

Bahasa Arab : 52 (D)

Sivik : 90 (A)

Conclusion : 2A's, 1B, 4C's, 3D's .

Percentage : 64.10%

Ranking : 5 Out Of 40 (Top 5)

There you have it. My 'beautiful' exam result. I guess I have to evolve into a bookworm after this, and focus to my studies. Also, get involved with the nerds in my school.

Oh ya, PMR is in, 93 Days.

bye.

You are so mean.

I admire, like, adore and care about this person. He's kinda my best cousin, cause we often share thoughts and ideas about something, we shared our secrets, and we also sometimes do something together, and last but not least we have the same leisure pursuit. We once promised to ourselves to not to have secrets between us, never do something bad towards each other, and live a life without any hatred between the both of us.
Recently, he blocked me from viewing his wall in his Facebook profile. I asked him why did he blocked me, and he said, " Only I can view my wall " . After he answered my question, I was a little bit calmed down. But just now, I viewed his profile through my brother's Facebook profile, and I could see his wall. But when I tried to view his wall through my Facebook profile, I can't. I was very disappointed after I knew that he lied to me about it.
And now, I'm wondering whether I should ask him again why did he blocked me from his Facebook profile and tell him that he lied to me, or just let him be? This is very depressing and it made me feel like I want to break my cousin-relationship with him. I know this may sound awkward to you, but if you put yourself in my shoes, you'll know what kind of feeling I'm feeling right now. I am so sad, and depressed.

hey, i'm joining this club !

u should follow too! if u're a Sabahan Bloggers. =D

'Holidays'

simplicity has made my day.

well, today, as usual, went to my grandmother's house cause its holiday and there'll be nobody at house or at school. I started my day off with a cup of coffee. haha. naah, I'm just joking. I started my day with waking up in the morning, and expecting something magical would happen to my day. I took my shower, and I went to my room and turned on the Wi-Fi device and online for a few minutes. Then, I went downstairs to get something to eat and sat down on the couch. as I heard my father's footsteps at the stairs, I finished my food and cleaned my hands then, I went inside the car to start up the car.

after a few minutes, I was in my grandmother's house, and I realized that, time flies so fast. there was nobody there, except for me, my uncle, my grandfather, and my grandmother. my uncle took off from house several minutes after I arrived. so now all that's left is the 3 of us. I was extremely bored as I got nothing to do, and I accidentally looked at the woods leftover from my school work a long time ago, and my mind suddenly have the urge to take the leftover woods, and make something from it. I took all of the things needed to build something from it, such as some nails, and other kinds of stuffs.

I went outside as I'm afraid that my grandfather would be awaken by the noise that I'll be making when making my 'project'. I started with thinking what shape will I do and what will it do good to me and the rest of my family. wow.. it took me half an hour to think about a shape and the structure of my model. finally, my mind has made its decision, and I'm building something kinda cool and weird at the same time. well, I think I don't have to tell you about what happened to my model. but, I'll give you a clue. its hideous. that's the only clue that I could give you peeps. after that, I went back into the house and thinking about what could I do.

after a while, I figured out what I could do that time. my mind was just perfect! I took the ribbon leftover inside the leftover things box. then, I used up the remaining woods which is long, and I tied the ribbon onto the long wood, and I played gymnastic artistic kinda game. after an hour of playing the stupid thing, I went inside the house and I had my lunch as I am extremely hungry that moment. well, in the evening, I didn't do anything, except for taking my bath, and fetched my younger sister from school.

okay, that's all for yesterday's story. bye. Goodnight peeps. =)